So yes, despite eating thirteen kiwi fruit a day, my poor little immune system has succumbed once again. I have Manflu.
How do I know that I have it and not ordinary Womanflu? Because I'm moaning incessantly, have only managed a 3 hour snooze since returning from work at lunchtime and can now only physically exert myself as far as DVD watching otherwise I become too weak and need help to operate the remote control. I've also lost my appetite (except for Battenburg cake, fig rolls and fruit drop scones). I would be more worried except for the fact that recent medical research bought a breakthrough in increasing the survival rate of Manflu in the form of the following equation:
F=√ (sofa comfort rating/amount of interesting programs on Sky)/( ≥ number of jobs waiting to be done ²)+(genuine symptoms/level of moaning)/c
Where F equals likelihood of survival and 'c' is a four letter word.
I did not cycle this morning though training and the aquiring of knowledge is going well plus Mondays have become my Rest Day in the Great Plan anyway. The Great Plan is secret but not because I'm going to announce I'm Team Saxo Bank's latest secret weapon or anything but because it involves training times and averages and other boring stuff, discussion of which will kill you to death with boredom but I can tell you it involves 42 gallons of butt butter and approximately 14 packets of Fig Power Rolls ™ per week.
Speaking of Team Saxo Bank....what of Fabulous Fabian? Three time World Time Trial Champion and Olympic gold medalist, winner of Tour of Flanders, Paris-Roubaix (twice), Milan-San Remo, Tirreno-Adriatico, Tour de Suisse, Monte Paschi Eroica, and three prologues of the Tour de France.. he also bloody gorgeous. Not as good looking as N *obviously* but its close and watching his lycra clad sweaty thighs pounding away at hills whilst genuinely studying his form for tips is currently my prescribed form of self medication...
As Chandler would say..Does illness *get* any better than this?
How do I know that I have it and not ordinary Womanflu? Because I'm moaning incessantly, have only managed a 3 hour snooze since returning from work at lunchtime and can now only physically exert myself as far as DVD watching otherwise I become too weak and need help to operate the remote control. I've also lost my appetite (except for Battenburg cake, fig rolls and fruit drop scones). I would be more worried except for the fact that recent medical research bought a breakthrough in increasing the survival rate of Manflu in the form of the following equation:
F=√ (sofa comfort rating/amount of interesting programs on Sky)/( ≥ number of jobs waiting to be done ²)+(genuine symptoms/level of moaning)/c
Where F equals likelihood of survival and 'c' is a four letter word.
I did not cycle this morning though training and the aquiring of knowledge is going well plus Mondays have become my Rest Day in the Great Plan anyway. The Great Plan is secret but not because I'm going to announce I'm Team Saxo Bank's latest secret weapon or anything but because it involves training times and averages and other boring stuff, discussion of which will kill you to death with boredom but I can tell you it involves 42 gallons of butt butter and approximately 14 packets of Fig Power Rolls ™ per week.
Speaking of Team Saxo Bank....what of Fabulous Fabian? Three time World Time Trial Champion and Olympic gold medalist, winner of Tour of Flanders, Paris-Roubaix (twice), Milan-San Remo, Tirreno-Adriatico, Tour de Suisse, Monte Paschi Eroica, and three prologues of the Tour de France.. he also bloody gorgeous. Not as good looking as N *obviously* but its close and watching his lycra clad sweaty thighs pounding away at hills whilst genuinely studying his form for tips is currently my prescribed form of self medication...
As Chandler would say..Does illness *get* any better than this?
With ya ALL the way, sister!!! :-D
ReplyDeleteI'm with ya ALL the way, sister!!! :-D xx
ReplyDeleteHope you're feeling better soon Jo. :-)
ReplyDeleteDoug. x
Thanks :) x
ReplyDeleteOh, you too, eh! My wife has also secretly fallen in love with the awesome Fabian!
ReplyDeleteWhat do you think of the hidden motor claims? I pity the fools who believe everything they see on youtube.
The rumours are a load of c*ap! They're even saying Basso has one now because he blew them away in the Giro.
ReplyDeleteNo, what they did was train lots and are naturally awesome (in the literal sense)on a bike.
Agreed! He's a grand example of just how developed the human engine can become with good training etc. Makes me feel lazy just looking at him. lol
ReplyDelete